July

It’s been two years since my life changed in a way that I never anticipated. I still struggle with being alone. I still struggle with this new reality. So much has changed over these past two years. I think it’s hard when you are forced to make a decision that you never wanted nor anticipated. And again, I struggle because I think I should be further along and that I shouldn’t miss my old life (and him) so much.

So I’m kind of feeling stuck at the moment. Which means I probably need to do something to kick-start me in a new direction.

I need to plan something to do for next July. Create new memories for July.

Shifting World

The ground shifted
Under her feet
Unexpectedly
Forever changing
What she knew

Scared to cross
the crevice
Of the old
into the new

Uncertainty filling the chasm
she steps across
the space
knowing the cost

It is the loss
of almost all
that she holds dear
in order to save herself

©christal july 2019

4 Comments

  1. Cilka says:

    Me too. Thanks for this.

  2. Strong says:

    You have a beautiful way with words. ?

    Sending you strength on this unpaved road that we never wanted to be on.

    1. christal says:

      Thank you so much. I hope you are doing well.

  3. He (and your life together) are part of who you are and always will be. Much as you might want to, you can’t excise it. All you can do is push it down, cover it with life affirming activities and thoughts and continue to become the person you want to be.

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